Monday, September 13, 2010

Irritation

I'm getting irritated.

It's as if either everyone is way too polite or no one knows what "healthy" is anymore.

I've been on a diet...excuse me "life style change"

at one point a couple years ago (when I first moved to Phoenix) I was depressed, had a horrible living situation, and eating crap. I gained a ton of weight. I got a wii fit and lost ten pounds of that. Kept it off for awhile and then had to move all of my belongings up to a third floor of an apartment building when I moved out of horrible living situation. Lost another ten, kept it off for the most part. I was curvey but no one ever called me fat (technically obese/overweight according to BMI at the time).

Met Evan, current husband extraordinaire. Kept the weight off but became really sensitive of my size...especially since the man could wear MY PANTS.

We celebrated our one month together in style and I ended up gaining 8 lbs. Oy.

Adopted Evan's lifestyle of eating for allergies and working out with him. Lost 20 lbs.

Took a break, gained about 6 back. Still in overweight/obese land.

Got married lost those 6 and then some for my wedding. Yay. Gained the some back over the course of honeymoon. Boo.

Started a lifestyle of working out twice a day and only eating 1100 calories. No results...misery.

Decided to do something safe and drastic and now the weight is pouring off and someone hit my eating reset button.

I eat really healthy right now and everyone comments on it.

"Are you on a diet?"

Yeah

"Well, you don't need to be"

and I want to scream because yes I do. I'm still away from a normal BMI for my height. I am closer everyday, but everyone this whole time (besides Evan who knew what everything was and knew it was unhealthy) has told me I don't need to do anything. Now especially since I am super close to my goal. But I was not healthy before and everyone wanted me to eat like them and look like them and I refuse to do it. I know people think I am weird now.

I don't care. America has a warped perspective about the whole healthy eating and weight thing and I was a perfect example of this.

I'm almost there, I'm the skinniest I've been in I don't even know how long. I'm inching into middle school territory if I really think about it..I think.

But I am finally getting happy with how I look and feeling way healthy. I may even post the pics of my journey with my face blurred (even though there are already pics of my face) but they were me and I am proud of how it's looking now.

If not I'll just dig up photos from the past few years and scan them in to show that kind of difference.

I am happier now with myself but this crazy diet is almost over and then comes the maintenance for 3 weeks and then living the rest of my life. I'm kind of terrified about this.

But I believe in me!

Monday, September 6, 2010

Life Styles A-changin'

When my job started up again, I got into a huge funk.

I couldn't get anything done. My weight was going back up. I was super stressed. There was too much to do and no time to do it.

Last week I went to my Geek Girl Goal Setting (nearly late and rushed) and said I wanted a schedule, to catch up on things, and to calm down.

I am starting this goal this week. There has been lots of things going on around here and I wanted to address some of them.

Goal #1
Catching up on the house.
It's almost there. Evan and made more work for ourselves and bought a bunch of things from IKEA and we've been putting them together throughout the weekend. I now own a king sized bed, two nightstands, and two tall dressers from the MALIM collection of IKEA.
The Kitchen is clean. The living room is clean. The bathroom (thank god) is clean. We moved out office into the bigger extra bedroom, which still needs to be cleaned and the former office needs to be cleaned out along with the closet. Our bedroom is a work in progress from all of the new IKEA stuff and moving out my old set. Which now needs to be craigslisted.
The house is almost there, and that actually takes a lot of stress out. I can come home and relax a bit now.
Still need to clean that car though.

Goal #2 MI reception stuff
Invites are mailed. My ring issue is being resolved (via a new ring, that is almost like my other one just more expensive) as is Evan's ring issue. Surgical grade steel ring = no allergic reaction. I also have a nice shiny plain band too. I bought plane tickets as well. The only few things left are to do the photo books and print photos from the wedding and honey moon. I will also have to get my dress altered since I have lost enough weight where it is sagging a bit. I'm going to call an alteration place this week.

Goal #3 Art
oooh boy. I've been THINKING about art. Not much doing. I owe a friend a prize picture, still need to do my next creative grab bag, Evan wants some help with a game, and my friend Connie wants to talk to me about a webcomic. I am hoping to sketch out the prize pic this week along with the sketch for my grab bag. Evan will be next week and Connie whenever I talk to her.

Goal #4 A schedule.
It will be done this week. I am a cheer coach now and have to use time wisely after school and during. I want to schedule in art time, cleaning time, relaxing time, and evan time.

Goal #5 Dietary Changes
I'm on a pretty restrictive diet right now, but it's working. I'm being creative with cooking and spices and am not bored at all. I'm over the halfway mark (if I do it for the 30 days, I may go the full 45...currently on day 20) and have been working out how I'm going to do this when I'm allowed other foods. I have good ideas and need to start writing them down somewhere so I don't forget how to do this. Also: tea and stevia are my new best friends. I have finally fallen in love with tea and drink it ALL the time.

Lots of things to do, not enough time to do it...but I'm getting there and enjoying it finally. I've reached some sort of inner peace I guess.

I'll just keep going.